Take 2...Action!

I'm starting to think a love like ours might be unparalleled...

I fell for you so hard on the weekend...over, and over, and over again...

It pains me quite a bit that we're on different levels career-wise...but it's also probably very meant to be for reasons that I just can't (and probably won't, or shouldn't) comprehend.

Change is on it's way regardless in that day to day function, and holy moly I can't wait! (who will the winner be?!?! no more losers for me :P )

I have a lot to give you...I think you see that...

I want you to be as proud of me as I am of you (at least sometimes!).

Yes, I'm a little slower then some...but don't the good things in life come to those who wait?

Patience is indeed a virtue.

*************************************************************************************

"You can flash-fry a buffalo in forty seconds."

: "Forty seconds? But I want it now!"

WIll You Still Love Me?

I was going to write a really lovey dovey poetic entry yesterday...I should have...

I now know, and understand, that you're generally unaware of how I'm actually feeling day to day.

At least that's easily solved!
(I hope.)

For as long as I can remember I've yearned for a partner (friend, family member...anyone really) who *actually* wanted to get to know me, and cared...

I finally found you <3

I won't deny that there is a lot of bad...but there's also *so* much more good.

Recap...Sort Of

T'was a blissfully amazing weekend...

It was one that I know I won't forget, and therefore won't be detailing as it's just unnecessary.

It ended shortly (or should I say curtly) at around 1am Saturday night, and from there...truthfully...pretty much ceases to exist until right now (blocking out the ick, no need to shadow the awesome, heh).

Still awaiting the new part-time job I desperately need...but I know I'll have it soon!

I've become painfully aware of the fact that I need to journal on a daily basis...but it won't be here...I like writing outside of the lines (it matches my thinking) :P

Feeling very weird with regards to us right now...but I don't think that's entirely off, as there's been a lot of negativity in our relationship over the past week or so...

I really don't see the disconnect sometimes, so it makes me wonder...

I'm not looking to sweat over the small things in life...and I really hope my life long partner feels the same.

I like happy.

That's what I'm going for.

Hopefully you are too (wonder, wonder, wonder...) <3

The Power of Failure

J.K. Rowling's terrific commencement address at Harvard is available as a video, MP3, or text.

http://harvardmagazine.com/go/jkrowling.html

"The fact that you are graduating from Harvard suggests that you are not very well-acquainted with failure....

I think it fair to say that by any conventional measure, a mere seven years after my graduation day, I had failed on an epic scale. An exceptionally short-lived marriage had imploded, and I was jobless, a lone parent, and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless. The fears my parents had had for me, and that I had had for myself, had both come to pass, and by every usual standard, I was the biggest failure I knew.

Now, I am not going to stand here and tell you that failure is fun. That period of my life was a dark one, and I had no idea that there was going to be what the press has since represented as a kind of fairy tale resolution. I had no idea how far the tunnel extended, and for a long time, any light at the end of it was a hope rather than a reality. So why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged. I was set free, because my greatest fear had already been realised, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life. ,...Failure gave me an inner security that I had never attained by passing examinations. Failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way....Such knowledge is a true gift, for all that it is painfully won, and it has been worth more to me than any qualification I ever earned...."

If at first you don't succeed... ;)

The New Girl

At long last this week is coming to a close.

It hasn't been the greatest one in memory, nor has it been the worst.

On a personal note; there were some extremely negative outbursts, that I'm not entirely proud to have been a part of. I don't feel as though anything even remarkably close to what happened should (or will) happen again. However...if the issues which arose...zombify...and decide not to die...I'll be choosing to *thwomp* them sharply on the head and running for the hills...

I find it extremely difficult to tolerate unnecessary personal drama, anger, and the many forms of hate that we can so easily and callously spread. I could be wrong, but these types of eruptions seem to multiply (internally and externally) quite a bit faster then their positive counterparts.

I want to enjoy the time I have remaining here on earth (and more so with you <3) with as few of those factors extending into my life as possible.

Anyhoo...

The horrific job aforementioned in this journal is now caput.

It's nice finally having the cahones to get, do, and be, what I want in life...both personally and professionally.

I'm growing up in a great way...I didn't treat myself as well as I could have in the past...but that's just what that is now...the past :)

From now on you're gettin' Sharon on 10.
I used to be Sharon on 6, and once, I was even Sharon on 3 and 3/8.
But now, I'm Sharon cranked to the max!
Deal with it!

hehe

Man oh Man

Oh, Miss R...

99% of the time I'm so insanely proud to be a woman.

Today however, that 1% reared its ugly head...

I'm not on my period, in P.M.S week, taking pills, recuperating from a bender, etc....
I've been eating pretty well, taking vitamins, getting exercise, etc.
...and yet, I've had the most whacked out emotions, thoughts, and feelings, ALL day!

Stupid female hormones *grumbles*

Sometimes I think it would be so much easier to be a man :P